f&n coursework. almost done with research. hahah. no wait. i'm already at development. hahaha. i'm kinda stucked. worst of all i left one of my files in the com lab! so irritating! and i can only get it back on thurs. that's when i got to show the teacher my research. so coincidental! whatever. haha. lucky there's another one to help. hahaha. school's alright. just that i kinda suck at lower sec's math. damn sian. there's cross country on thursday. hhaah. still deciding whether to run or be marshall. lol. alright that's all for today. i'm gonna be MUCH MUCH happier these few days. i've thought over it. i shall not be bothered with small irrelevant stuffs.

LOVE LOADS TO ALL MY READERS!

8:13 PM

oh ya. got back my test papers alr. it's TERRIBLE la. failed most of it. i think i only passed my eng and math. the rest all fail. ahhaa

eng-27/50
chi-24/50 DAMN!
math-37/50 wth one more mark alr can get A1! URGH
chem-11/40
phy-4/40 i know my science is terrible la. ahha.
ss-8/25 i did try my best k. i forgot most of it. my mind suddenly went BLANK. not my fault.
f&n-7/20

see it's that bad. okay i'll study for the rest of my exans and test so no one will start NAGGING at me. i hate naggy people. so please DO NOT nag. cos i'll hate you too. =)

5:15 PM

had PE today! lol. have been waiting for PE. lol. can relieve stress and PERSPIRE! lol. so we ran 1 round ard the carpark. then shutter run. unique one. had to sprint to the curb touch it and go back. split into 4 groups girls ran first. lol. the last one had to run stairs. so kylie asked me to run slowly with her. haha. but in the end we didnt run stairs. then ran another 6 rounds ard the carpark. hahaha. glad i didnt give up. i didnt stop! hahaha. then incline pull ups. and monkey bars. then went to play floor ball! super nice la! haha. played a little while then changed position. went to be the goal keeper. ahhaha. charmaine was there to help me. DEFENDER! ahaha. then i was like quite protected. super cool la. hahaha. in the end DRAW. hahaha. good! lol. next lesson we alr BOOKED the floorball! super cool! hahaha. cant wait for PE! YAYY! ahhaha

duan li is such a LIAR. he says using aluminium foil as class notice board back ground is old and outdated. so stupid. it's like SOSO unique. no class used it lar. stupid and brainless. and he anyhow use the teacher's name. USELESS LONGBEAN! acting depressed after that. trying to gain attention. but no one bothered. WHATEVER DUAN LI.

5:00 PM

everything's wrong. 2006 just sucks big time. results. friends. school. juniors. cca. parents and so on. results. not so ideal. didnt really study. so nvm. friends. this girl i didnt even do anything to her. and she scolded me sucks and bitch on msn. like WTH. i asked her something this morning. NICELY. and she gave me that face and answer. school. LESSONS mainly. juniors. one wants to quit. cos he change his attitude. showing that super whatever attitude. another one skips training. acting like some beng. maybe he is. i dont know. and now the whole of sec 3 doesnt want to wear uniform. cos we pioneers arent wearing. we were given instructions that we didnt have to wear them. and they havent even went through spec course. cca. i feel extra. stupid there. there's practically NOTHING to do there. i'm just wasting my time. example. not any staffs. not incharge of anything. just wasting my time. parents. BIASE. they just dont bother about me. all they ever wanted was just my results. TOP in everything.

it's just sucks la. everything seems wrong. trying to help people. so what. they dont even care. forget it. no one cares. i hate it.

9:59 PM

when was the last time your parents ever praise you for something good that you've done?

okay that sounds stupid. but then again. my parents most of the time would scold me or misunderstand me for things i've never done. take just now for an example. i had to wake my bro up cos i needed him to help my sis record the show. then after a very short while he started crying out loud. i asked him why of course. he said he's gonna be late for his meeting. i told him my dad just came home. and soon my parents opened the door. they of course saw him crying. they asked why. he kept quiet. so i thought i shall help him answer. and after saying. my dad said:WHY MUST YOU 2 ALWAYS QUARREL!? i was so super pissed la. i shouted back. i didnt even quarrel i merely asked for his help and he cried. and now you're blaming me. i just went back to my room to do my stuff. he came in and he asked: why must you always have to force him to do stuffs.

i was so pissed. they TOTALLY misunderstood me. WTH. i only asked for his help. somemore i woke him up for his meeting. and now they are blaming me for things i didnt do. they NEVER fail to blame me when something happens to their PRECIOUS son. biase i say. but so what? do you think they even care about how i feel. they bring him to the the doctor for the stupidest reason. and now he's super spoilt. and they turn around blaming me for any reason. they always see him as SMART and everything. and just cos i'm in normal acad and used to be from st nicks. they expect me to get TOP in everything. they always go : you should get top in this and that cos you're from st nicks.

so what if i'm from st nicks?! if i can get top in everything i would be in express. or rather SPECIAL. no wait. maybe PERFECT. getting top in everything. dont they even know why i'm in normal acad? it just cos i aint that good in studies. i am not a books person. forget it. they dont even understand.

you may think that i'm rude or what. nevermind cos it's true
stupid day. everything seems so against me.

7:47 PM

today's total defence day. first 2 period no electricity. not that hot la. then normal lessons. felt like puking during recess. nothing came out. then back to class. ss lesson was funny. haha. mrs koh taught us some english thing. the correct pronounciation. haha. then went to the bomb shelter. hahha. stuffy in there. then had a short talk on what to do. went to the hall for some play. super boring. and went home. it's a hot hot day.

best valentine's day ever.
=) 14.02.06.

4:21 PM

FOOD POISONING! vomitted alot. at ben's bbq. on the way home, in the car. walking to my house. and in my house. vomitted more than 10 times. went to 24 hours clinic. got a JAB and a test for diabetes. finger prick. OUCH. went back and vomitted a pail of water. SIGH. felt super uncomfortable. went to bed. got slight fever in the morning. MEDICINE & MORE MEDICINE. SIANS. went for faith formation and then mass. boring. went home to sleep! lol. then woke up feeling super hungry. didnt really eat anything. just half a bowl of mee tai bah. slacked around. then dinner. lau yee sheng. ate a little. and dinner. struggling thru. PATHETIC la. yes. drank lots of water. and soon got DIARRHOEA. sians. i'm dehydrated. URGHS. hate being sick. TOTALLY. should i go to school tmr? BORED.

tomorrow's my MUMMY's BIRTHDAY! =)

6:10 AM

there's PE tmr! haha. i'll be STINKY. mr fernandez is a GOOD pe teacher. lol. skipped physics&chem tutorial again. helped miss nadleen & mrs maria lim with the home economics notice board. haha. and i realised that. mrs lim really talks like auntie. haha. but then she's really very different during and after school. she's MUCH nicer after school ends. haha. but before school end. super different. i rather the after school her. haha. yes. DUAN LI SAID THAT NOTICE BOARD IS C-U-R-S-E-D. but luckily i'm BLESSED. hence i will not be affected. okay.

GOOD LUCK TO ALL THOSE TAKING YOUR O LEVEL RESULTS TMR!
I'LL PRAY FOR YOU ALL!

i feel so hurt by what you said. it immediately slashed my heart. forget it. you dont understand.

9:42 PM

tuesdays-

early morning before the alarm rings my eyes open widely.
i wait silently for the alarm to ring.
impatiently stood to look at the clock.
i wonder why is it still so early.
i try to go back to sleep. it's difficult.
i turn and turn. unable to sleep.
i start to think. think about the possibles&impossibles.
did i really do what's right? did i really want it that way?
more&more questions. deep in thoughts suddenly
the alarm rang. dreadfully i dragged myself to the toilet.
thinking and still thinking. i've thought of many things.
reaching school. i wonder whether i've done all my work.
brought all my books. so on and so forth.
back to class. lessons started. cencentration wasnt working.
daydreaming in short. stared blankly. didnt really understand.
sneezed&sneezed. i'm getting sick.
NCC. no mood to change. took over cherlene.
part b's were cute. they were bored. i was bored too.
juniors taught drills. practically slacked thru out.
wasted my whole time there.
NCC i'm just practically wasting my time.
there's nothing for me to do. just walking&slacking.
only STAFF's got things to do. and the rest.
for them to look down on. whatever.
some childish kid on msn.
look at yourself before saying anything.
i aint perfect. you're worse.

i'm freaking bored. i feel i've changed. been having moodswings & tempermental & the hack care attitude. i hate it. but i just cant be bother. see.

9:49 PM

school's still as boring as usual. i love ah huat's lesson. his funny hand actions make my laugh till my stomach hurts. haha. recess ate in class cos kylie brought food. chem i didnt even understand a single thing. the teacher's cute. stared at him for awhile. math is getting better and better each lesson. i'm slowly understanding BEARINGS! hooray. english homework. COMPO! SUPER TOUGH. i've finish all my TOUGH homework. crap. i'm starting to feel the STRESS already. it's only FEBRUARY! nevermind. i wont give up. i'll fight! son's cute today. x) super la.

that's school for me. boring&stress.

training tmr and i havent even folded my uniform. got to rush.


sometimes when i'm quiet i'm actually waiting for something.
and maybe all i ever wanted was just for your surprises.
waiting and waiting. slowly i get impatient.
soon i find it so boring. then pressure starts.
i hold on till i cant. eventually i gave up.
but did i really give you up?
that you've got to find up yourself. x)
make good use of valentines day.
your last chance. believe me. it's really the last.

i'll wait to see your changes.
if you really want me back.
make me feel it. =)


cya all!

10:53 PM

math is getting tougher! harder and harder. got super fed up and pissed today during math. kept asking for help then they keep giving me answer. i want them to TEACH. wth. nvm called the teacher SOOOO many times but she didnt even reply me. in the end got super pissed. slammed my book closed it. lol i cried la. super irritated. that's school for me today. no mood for studying.

i'm sorry for what's i've said.
i know it's a hard to do so.
maybe one day we'll be like last time.
maybe i've already regretted.
but so sorry.
i dont want to go back now.
i know i still have that thing for you. it's in me.

promise me if you ever find someone else better than me
go for her. i'll be here supporting you. =)

i'll always remember those days. smiling and walking together. you accepted me no matter how i looked or how i was. thank you. thank you so much.

2:43 PM

i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored i'm bored

school's boring. everything's boring! BORING BORING BORING! i'm still bored.
can you tell i'm really bored? haha.

iloveyou
imissyou
iloveyou
imissyou
iloveyou
imissyou
=)

7:01 PM